Everything changes but you ...

So I feel I should apologise for being a bit missing in action for the last couple of months - super busy as usual!

I started a new contract back at the beginning of July, then the schools broke up and the kids were home for the summer and since then I have been in a bit of a tailspin. I may have mentioned before that I am not a big fan of change (which really is ironic considering that for a day job I work in IT transformation and change programmes!) and honestly there has been a lot of change recently which has left me feeling a bit out of sorts.

Firstly my beautiful boy finished primary school and next week will start at high school. I should point out that I cried when the big girl started nursery and I cried buckets when she finished nursery. I was convinced I had gotten that out of my system so imagine my surprise that I have cried at the end of every school year since. Don’t get me wrong, the boy is more than ready for high school, he is going to a great school and aside from a tiny wobble about leaving the comfort blanket of primary school he is super excited to get stuck in. Maybe it is the thought of him leaving the safety net of our lovely little primary school and being ready to start this next phase in life that I find so overwhelming - how I will cope when the little girl leaves I do not know!!!

In the same week that the school term finished our lovely neighbours moved house - not far - but no longer just across the street. When we first moved onto our little street it was because we knew so many people on the street and it felt like a safe place for us to be after such a period of change. And indeed it was and continues to be a safe place. My neighbour is much more than a neighbour, she is a friend, a confidante, we look after each other’s children and dogs and she is one of my biggest cheerleaders. No longer being able to open the front door and see her every day felt like a big change.

And then another dear friend absconded to Australia for two years with her lovely family last week. I am so excited for them all as they embark on this adventure of a lifetime and I can’t wait for us to go and visit next summer. But when everything was falling apart this lovely lady really was there for me - many a g&t was imbibed in my kitchen whilst attempting to put the world to rights. And when I say I miss her I think maybe what I really mean is I didn’t tell her how much she means to me and how much she helped me through it all!

As for work - before this job I was at one company for 3 years which is like a lifetime for a contractor. I worked in an amazing team and whilst we worked really hard and spent a lot of time travelling we had a great laugh and I guess I am really just missing that. And as with all new jobs you are kind of finding your way around and working out how to do everything - just made me feel like I didn’t know what I was doing.

But you know all of these things are ok - I am always ok once a “new normal” has been established:

• The boy has been at summer camp at his new school all week, made new friends and mastered his cycling route to school

• My lovely neighbour and I have become much better at actually making plans to see each other rather than just knowing we are always across the street

• And Australia is just a WhatsApp or FaceTime away right?

• Work - well I am getting there!!

But what has this got to do with running? Well in the words of the oh so talented Gary Barlow “Everything changes but you..” and by that I mean that whilst so much else has changed around me and left me feeling tired and overwhelmed and like I am a bit done with adulting, running has remained an absolute constant, given me my timeout and my headspace and served as a reminder that I do bloody know what I am doing!!!

Much love xx

Running - it's a mental game

So you all know that I love to run, running is my headspace, my time to think and my escape.  Everything changes and there has been a lot of change in my life but running has remained a constant and seen me through a lot of bad times.  But whilst running is my headspace and I am great at showing up and doing the work, on race day I can feel like an absolute imposter and can talk myself into a really dark place with a lot of negative self-talk instead of sitting back enjoying the moment knowing that I have put all the hard work in.  Once you listen to the negative voices it is a long way back – but how do you deal with those voices and what to do when your own worst enemy is in your head?

After a relatively disappointing (in my eyes) showing at the Liverpool Marathon last May I have spent a lot of time and effort working on my mental game – I have read books, listened to audio books and podcasts – mainly whilst on the treadmill (where else would I be!!), all with the aim of quieting that negative little voice in my head and finding some strategies to deal with my own self-doubt.

I went off to the Prague marathon at the beginning of May having missed loads of training due to injury and until the week before wasn’t sure that I would make the start, however, something was very different – I went with a completely different mental attitude – I guess having missed so much training meant that I wasn’t aiming for a PB and in fact my only aim was to finish pain free.  And with the pressure off I found myself enjoying the entire race (well maybe not the cobbles!).  26.2 miles is a long way to run and you always go through tough patches during the race but this time I was much more able to acknowledge it was tough and that everything was hurting and know that it would pass.

So some of that effort working on my mental game seems to have paid off – and it got me to thinking perhaps we could all do with a bit of therapy.  If you get injured you go see someone for treatment right away but no one talks about what to do to fix your mental game.  So I wanted to share with you some of the stuff I have been listening to and reading:

• I really enjoyed Ant Middleton’s book “First Man In - Leading from the Front” – I listened to most of this whilst training on the treadmill in the hotel gym in Dubai – what a fantastic view from the gym that was.  I think listening to the book was the first time that it really sunk in that my mind really is my own worst enemy and made me understand that my legs will keep going long after my mind wants me to stop.  I also really got the idea of how to use pain to drive you forward – running marathons hurts but the ability to use the pain is a game-changer.

• I have started listening to Jonathan Levitt’s “For the Long Run” podcast  I have followed Jonathan on Instagram for some time now and his podcasts are really great listens.  The episode with Emily Saul, in particular, was like a series of little lightbulb moments for me and some of those things I will talk about in a later post but one of the things she talked about was being able to recognize yourself for the badass that you are.  Most of us are just really bad at this, I am an awesome cheerleader for my kids, for my family and friends, for the kids I coach at school and for my colleagues – but for me not so much.  And then as I turned the corner onto the last 100m in Prague it hit me that I am pretty badass at what I do, and Emily was right once you recognize what a badass you are and become your own cheerleader your whole perspective will change!

Next stop, Ryan Hill’s “Run the Mile You are In.”  Any tips and suggestions on great reads gratefully received! And FYI just by getting your trainers on and getting out the door you are crushing it!!

Much love xx

Prague Marathon Weekender

Seriously where the does the time go – I cannot believe that this time last week we had just landed in Prague.  Honestly last Friday didn’t get off to the best start – we spent an hour talking-down a very tearful and stressed 11 year old before he would go into school – and then the fur baby chewed through the chord on my hairdryer.  Technically she did me a favour because having invested in a new hairdryer I now know how old and ineffective my old hairdryer was but I am not telling her that!!

Finally we made it to the airport and bought all the food for the flight – I hate to be without food!!!  Saturday was spent on a quick trip to the super well organized expo to collect our numbers and t-shirts, eating a lot and discussing what to wear for the race – the weather was quite a bit cooler than we had expected which gave us something to stress about!

I had a very clear idea of how I was going to run the race – I wanted to go out at a conservative pace that I knew I could stick with and keep to my nutrition plan.  I was also very clear with myself that if my back started really hurting (not the “it aches everywhere” because I am running a marathon but an actual injury pain) then I would pull up.  So after final kit discussions and breakfast it was time to drop our bags and get in our pens to start.

I have done a lot of reading and listening to audiobooks and podcasts over the last year – all aimed at upping my mental game when it comes to running – and it seems that some of that work is finally paying off.  I spent a lot of the race talking to myself about how I may feel tired but that would be normal given the lack of training and checking in with how I was feeling.  And I have to say that the whole race went brilliantly – there was no hitting the wall, no feeling like I couldn’t go on and more importantly no pain!

I stuck to my plan the entire time and whilst marathon number 7 was most definitely not my fastest marathon it ranks right up there in terms of enjoyment.  So much went right and I am absolutely buzzing with the result – nothing better than turning onto the home straight with 500 metres to go and realising you have actually got this!

So here are my takeaways from a successful weekend:

• I know you will have heard this a million times but your mind REALLY is your own worst enemy and it will most definitely give up before your body – it has taken me a long time to really get this

• Don’t let your mind wander to the “dark place” – you know the place that says “I can’t do this and I need to stop” – it is a tough road back from there

• Counting in kilometres weirdly made it feel like I was getting done faster – I mean you would think that having 20 miles would sound better than 30 kilometres right but weirdly not!

• Nutrition, nutrition, nutrition – when you get it right, you get it right!!  It is so easy to misjudge race nutrition or to think you will wait to take a gel because you are feeling good and then before you know it the wheels fall off.  This time I stuck religiously to my plan – first gel an hour in and then a gel every half hour after that and it just worked – they didn’t hand out gels in Prague so I carried my own which was actually less stressful than being reliant on gel stations

• I think flexible race plans are the new me – it really made the whole thing a lot less nerve-wracking knowing that I had a backup plan if things started to go wrong or not the way I had planned

• You know they always say marathon courses are flat – they rarely are (in racing if the course is said to be undulating it will feel like you have climbed mountains by the end!) – Prague is an exception to prove the rule, it really is flat and a great course but the cobbles are brutal!!  I am yet to live down the fact that I vetoed Copenhagen and Hamburg because of the cobbles!!

So all in all a really positive race weekend – and a huge confidence boost for Berlin later this year.

Last but most definitely not least huge shout out to my amazing running buddy who ran a blistering 4:07 in only her second marathon – that BQ is within touching distance!!  So proud to be on this crazy running journey with you – may there be many more miles, crazy race weekends and memories made!!

Next stop NYC!

Much love xx

Heigh-ho, heigh-ho it’s off to Prague we go …

2 days to go to the Prague Marathon and the nerves and excitement are setting in, I have laid out piles of clothes, put them all away and laid out different piles instead.  I have packed and re-packed and I think it is safe to say I have kit to cover all weather eventualities!!

Travelling with hand luggage only comes with it’s own problems of trying to squeeze all the gels and toiletries into that tiny wee airport issued plastic bag – there have been many iterations of what I need to fit into that bag – suffice to say the absolute essentials of gels and Biofreeze have secured their place and I will need to buy deodorant, shampoo and conditioner after security at the airport.  Seems I am less worried about clean hair than having the right nutrition during the race!!!

I cannot wait to get to Prague and to pick up my number at the Expo tomorrow.  I am feeling strangely calm at the moment and am sure this is a side effect of missing so much training through injury.  I know that whilst I have missed so much training there is nothing I can do to change that, I cannot literally cram a month’s worth of training in now.  I know that the important thing is to arrive uninjured – a month ago I was convinced I would not make the start line but here I am ready to go so that is a positive.

I read an article in which Paula Radcliffe talked about having a flexible race plan – this really struck a chord with me as I am one for having a plan and then getting a bit hung up when it doesn’t all go exactly according to plan.  For example at the Liverpool Marathon last year the first gel station was not quite where we expected it to be AND it was at the bottom of a hill, by the time I got to the gel station I was so panicked about being late taking my gel that I forced it down as I ran uphill – think it took me about 5 miles to get over that physically but mentally I was still thinking about it even when I finished the race!

This year I have taken Paula’s advice to heart – having been injured this is already a very different race than I anticipated or hoped for and I am not out to get a PB on Sunday.  No, this race is very definitely not about a PB.  My plan is to take it as it comes - no getting hung up on gels and splits and pace and times I promise.  Plan B - just enjoy the race and the atmosphere and celebrate the fact that I am uninjured and I get to run – that sounds like a good plan right?

Must dash – got to go pack and repack some more and see if I can squeak a couple more things into that tiny liquids bag.

Much love xx

I am not very good at being injured ....

I am not very good at being injured – fact!!  Luckily for those around me I have been away on work trips for most of the time that I have been injured so no one has really had to put up with my sulking!!

So here’s the thing – for so long now I have been in a whirlwind of training cycles from one race to the next.   I have talked before about how having a race scheduled in is a huge motivator for me – I love a plan and I love to tick off all those hard sessions and know what I am working so hard for.  I like to know that I am getting up and out of the door for a session at the crack of sparrows or pounding away on the treadmill long after the kids have gone to bed for a reason but it wasn’t always like that.

I ran my first marathon in 2003 – I swore I would never run another and it did take me 9 years before I ran my second.  In the time between my first and second marathons running was just something I did as exercise, something to get me out of the door.  I went back to running pretty quickly after each of the kids came along as a way to lose my pregnancy weight and to get some headspace.  Running was more time effective than going to the gym – lace up and head out for 30 minutes and that was all there was to it.

Since 2012 (the year I did my second marathon in London) I have done a further 5 marathons, and who knows how many half marathons.  I have trained long and hard for each marathon and this year was set to be no different – although this is the first year that I will be doing two marathons.

And then I got injured!  And it may have taken a while but I have learnt a couple of things during this period of enforced rest:

• I really am not great at being injured – I know my buddy and I always say we are extremely lucky not to have gotten injured but I am not sure we realised how lucky we really were until we both got injured.  At first I was pretty adamant it was not a running related injury and determined to run through it which was the worst thing to do.  I finally saw the chiropractor and as soon as she said I could start running again I got straight back on plan and re-injured – cue another 5 days rest!!  So this week I have been very careful – stuck to the treadmill and kept it to easy runs – what can I say I am a slow learner!

• I have worked really hard to take the positives out of this period – and one of those is that I really need to listen to my body a bit better.  I have also now realised that I need to pay more attention to stretching and strengthening – so pilates here I come!

• But one of the biggest things to come out of being injured is remembering why I run – it isn’t all about the training plans and the medals.  Running has taken me on some amazing adventures and I have met some amazing friends on my running journey, running has been a constant for me whilst so much else has changed.  Running has been my headspace, my me time, my thinking time, my time when no one calls me Mum, time when I can work through so much – in short running makes me a better me.

So as my running buddy and I prepare to head off to Prague I know I have missed more training than for any other marathon and it has been a very different training cycle than we had envisaged.  The plan for the race is to enjoy it and have fun and remember that we are lucky that we get to run – and along the way remember why we run!!!

And then I promise to sign up to a pilates class when I am back!!

Jane xx

Aaaargggghhhh I am injured and it is only six weeks to Prague!!!

Don’t ask me what I did because I don’t know, I don’t remember doing anything to hurt my back but last Thursday when I went out for my run early in the morning it was pretty painful – you know that part where it always hurts right in your lower back?  For me it is always on the right-hand side only which I put down to the fact that I had a patella tendon realignment on my right knee in 1998 – clearly I do not know whether this is really a contributing factor or not!!!

Anyway so I persevered with my run on Thursday despite it being pretty painful because it was not actually getting any worse so surely it would just click and be alright right? WRONG WRONG WRONG!!!  By the end of Thursday it was pretty painful all the time – but this was mainly due to sitting in a meeting room all day in the world’s most uncomfortable chair and actually nothing to do with insisting on running whilst injured.  You see where I am going with this?

Finally I googled “running and backpain” – I actually wanted Google to tell me I was right to continue running whilst my back hurt because the pain was not a running related injury.  Instead I stumbled upon a neat article which suggested that I am in fact experiencing a running related injury and then asked a number of questions to establish the cause of my injury:

1. Have you been travelling recently – we all know that your body recovers and repairs when you sleep right – so I guess if you are not sleeping well because you are staying in hotels you are giving your body less time to recover
   

2. What surfaces are you running on – if you constantly pound hard pavements you are putting more pressure on your joints than if you are running on softer surfaces
   

3. Is it time for new shoes – manufacturers recommend you run 300 – 500 miles on your shoes before changing them and nowadays people tend to recommend you cycle through several pairs of shoes at a time
   

4. Have you recently upped your mileage, started training for your first marathon or are you about six weeks into a marathon training cycle?

Ok, there were a few more questions but you get the picture – GUILTY GUILTY GUILTY!!!

• I have been travelling for work four out of the last five weeks, staying in hotels in the Middle and Far East – so not only am I not sleeping great in hotels, but I am also dealing with jet lag – just when I get sorted I get to go home!!
  

• At home we are blessed with some fantastic places to run off-road and it is all pretty muddy and squishy at this time of year, out here I have been running consistently on roads and pavements
  

• Alright so I do cycle through a number of pairs of shoes – Nike Wildhorses for off-road, Mizuno Wave Riders for the road, On Cloudflow for the treadmill but Strava has been telling me for ages that they all need changing!
  

• And of course I am right at the top end of my training cycle for the Prague Marathon!!!

So now I know this is a running related injury and I know I need to stretch and rest – and this is where I backed right off and rested right?  Except I didn’t!!  By Sunday I decided that my back felt a lot better so popped out for a quick run to see how it felt – suffice to say it didn’t go brilliantly (why would it – I had allowed myself two whole days of rest!) so I tried the exercise bike instead – which induced some eye-watering cracking and pain.  I had a little pity party and ran through all the worst-case scenarios – which inevitably ended with me not being able to run Prague.

After that I had a long text chat with my running buddy (the bestest running buddy in the business) who also happens to be injured.  We talked about how frustrated we are and talked about how we are literally falling apart and then she repeated the pep talk her husband had given her – which I would no doubt have had in person had I been at home.  We both said we were being very sulky and grumpy and I admitted I may have visited the Cheesecake Factory to cheer myself up!

This morning I got up early and went to the gym and walked on the treadmill – yes I just walked.  No pressure, I didn’t even try to run because finally it had clicked – I was so worried about training for Prague I just couldn’t allow myself the time to rest even though all I was doing was making things worse.  So I spent an hour listening to Ant Middleton this morning whilst walking and he is right – your mind really is your own worst enemy and patience really is a virtue!!

Jane x

P.s. I would like to thank the Cheesecake Factory who made sulking a bit more enjoyable, Ant Middleton for his wise words that finally hit home and as always my running buddy and her super human husband for always being there even if I am thousands of miles away!!!!

Flying long haul messes with your mind and your body!!!

So I was busy writing a blog post about “Am I really a runner if I don’t race?” but then I had pretty much the worst long run on the treadmill ever last night – a combination of jet lag, the after effects of a 14 hour flight and the hottest hotel gym in the world so I thought I would talk about that instead!

Let’s start with last night – the Prague Marathon is just over 2 months away and so I am right at the most intense period of my training schedule and right now I am traveling a lot for work, last year I took 28 flights, this year I am going to spend 4 out of the next 5 weeks in the Middle East and Asia – juggling a full-time job, travel and training for another marathon is a tough ask.

Had I been at home, yesterday would have been a long slow distance run of 2 hours 30 with the last 20 minutes at goal race pace.  But I am not at home – I am 6745 miles and 8 time zones away from home! Because of this my coach said just do 1 hour 30 on the treadmill – easy right? Well that is what I thought but it was the hardest run I have had in ages – about an hour in I even had to give up listening to my audiobook – seems even Ant Middleton’s dulcit tones couldn’t help me out!  I found myself endlessly repeating “one more minute” whilst counting down the seconds!

So why does long haul travel make you feel so bad?

• Firstly I guess travel is just tiring, flying is not just about the time spent in the air, flying is the time it takes to get to the airport, dropping your bags, getting through security, waiting to board, not to mention clearing customs on arrival, collecting your bags and getting to your final destination – as well as the flight itself.

• A 14 hour flight and an 8 hour time difference mucks up your body clock – as if travelling through 8 time zones wasn’t enough on board the plane you are expected to eat and sleep at funny times.  On the way out here we were given dinner at 11pm and then meant to sleep, we were told to keep the blinds down though because as we flew further east we were actually in broad daylight.  Finally we were served breakfast 2 hours before landing – fine if we were still on UK time but it was already 3pm at our destination – no wonder your body is confused right?

•   Change in temperature – I know we are having unseasonably warm weather for February back home (pretty sure we are going to get one more icy blast before spring is finally sprung though!) but Singapore is different gear hot and humid. So here’s me used to being bundled up in layers of jumpers and coats in the cold, damp of the UK winter and suddenly I am in Singapore and it is 34 degrees with 50% humidity so I am bound to feel a bit out of sorts and generally just unused to the heat right?

So what can you do about it?

I am sure we all know that we are meant to try and stay awake once you get where you are going but recently I read an article in which some pro-cycling teams gave their tips on flying long haul:

• Start to acclimatise to the time zone before you go – ok so this might be slightly impractical but they did suggest starting to shift your bedtime and mealtimes nearer to those of your destination a few days before you travel – I get the idea just not sure how practical that would be whilst still working and managing three kids!

• Watch what you eat on the plane – plane food is not always the best and as I mentioned before you can end up eating at some fairly odd times so best not to rely on what you are given and take some snacks of your own and make sure you stay hydrated whilst flying. This one I can do - the thought of not having food with me sends me into a blind panic!

• Get some rest on the plane – this is a fairly easy one for me – as my colleagues will attest I can sleep anywhere and am usually asleep before we even take off – I don’t know but something about waiting for other people to board wears me out!!  If you struggle to sleep try a sleep mask, earphones and comfy clothes to see if that helps.

• Finally when you get where you are going, get out and get some fresh air if is still daylight – this sends a message to your body that it is still daytime and not time to sleep.  Oh and make sure you eat at the proper mealtimes – again this helps to reset your body clock.

Some of these tips have really helped me - if only to make me more mindful of why I just had the worst session ever!! For me, running really forces my body and mind to acclimatise to the changes in temperature and to adjust my circadian rhythm – just being tired at the right time really helps me reset. 

Whilst there are a lot of things you can do to minimise the effects of travelling long-haul it can still feel pretty tough for a couple of days, with that in mind I am off out for an easy 5 miles this evening, hoping that it doesn’t feel as bad as last night!

Much love xx

The 2 pieces of kit you need when you start running

So last week my friend and I made our annual trip to Lululemon with our hard-earned vouchers for completing their January Strava Challenge. As usual I spent ages gazing at the row upon row of kit in a dazzling array of colours, shapes and sizes and as usual everything I bought was black!. If you know me that will come as no surprise - there is nothing wrong with black kit ok!

Anyway the trip got me thinking how daunting it can be to work out what, amongst all this kit, you actually need if you are just starting out - there is so much choice out there, so many gadgets and so many bits and bobs that people will tell you are must-haves - compression tights, underlayers, specialist socks, gloves, hats, headbands, technical shirts, and let’s not even start on all the wearable tech - that is a whole new post right there!

So what do you really need to get started? I honestly think there are really only two things worth investing time and money in when you are just starting out - and by that I mean if you invest a bit of time into doing some research you can save yourself a load of money. So here you go my top two bits of kit are:

1. A good sports bra - (if you are a guy you can probably skip this one!) - seriously getting the right bra will make your whole running experience much more comfortable - even if you are small you will need some level of support.
   
   Do a bit of internet research to work out what kind of support you need - most bras are categorized in terms of size, level of support and the sport for which they are intended.
   
   Once you have worked out what type of bra you need have a look at websites like www.SportShoes.com for deals and check out TKMaxx - they always have great choices at good prices if you don’t mind a little rummage!
   

2. Shoes - badly fitting/old/unsupportive shoes can land you in a world of trouble and put you out of action before you even get started.
   
   If you are unsure where to start it may be worth visiting a good retailer to get a gait analysis done. Runners Need is a really good place to start - the stores are always very friendly, have a great range of shoes in stock and are able to offer sound advice on what you should be wearing.
   
   Right now Runners Need will swap your dodgy old trainers for a sparkly £20 voucher off a new pair!
   

   Stores will usually offset the cost of the analysis against any shoes you buy instore but you may end up paying top dollar for your shoes. Instead don’t be afraid to pay for the analysis and then go shop around for a good price - again www.sportshoes.com have great deals and if you are not fussy about having your shoes in the latest colours (they are just going to get muddy anyway right?!) you can usually get last season’s shoes online for around 30 - 50% off the full price!

So a good bra and good shoes and everything else can wait, hope this helps. Shout if you have any questions!

Much love xx