So you all know that I love to run, running is my headspace, my time to think and my escape. Everything changes and there has been a lot of change in my life but running has remained a constant and seen me through a lot of bad times. But whilst running is my headspace and I am great at showing up and doing the work, on race day I can feel like an absolute imposter and can talk myself into a really dark place with a lot of negative self-talk instead of sitting back enjoying the moment knowing that I have put all the hard work in. Once you listen to the negative voices it is a long way back – but how do you deal with those voices and what to do when your own worst enemy is in your head?
After a relatively disappointing (in my eyes) showing at the Liverpool Marathon last May I have spent a lot of time and effort working on my mental game – I have read books, listened to audio books and podcasts – mainly whilst on the treadmill (where else would I be!!), all with the aim of quieting that negative little voice in my head and finding some strategies to deal with my own self-doubt.
I went off to the Prague marathon at the beginning of May having missed loads of training due to injury and until the week before wasn’t sure that I would make the start, however, something was very different – I went with a completely different mental attitude – I guess having missed so much training meant that I wasn’t aiming for a PB and in fact my only aim was to finish pain free. And with the pressure off I found myself enjoying the entire race (well maybe not the cobbles!). 26.2 miles is a long way to run and you always go through tough patches during the race but this time I was much more able to acknowledge it was tough and that everything was hurting and know that it would pass.
So some of that effort working on my mental game seems to have paid off – and it got me to thinking perhaps we could all do with a bit of therapy. If you get injured you go see someone for treatment right away but no one talks about what to do to fix your mental game. So I wanted to share with you some of the stuff I have been listening to and reading:
I really enjoyed Ant Middleton’s book “First Man In - Leading from the Front” – I listened to most of this whilst training on the treadmill in the hotel gym in Dubai – what a fantastic view from the gym that was. I think listening to the book was the first time that it really sunk in that my mind really is my own worst enemy and made me understand that my legs will keep going long after my mind wants me to stop. I also really got the idea of how to use pain to drive you forward – running marathons hurts but the ability to use the pain is a game-changer.
I have started listening to Jonathan Levitt’s “For the Long Run” podcast I have followed Jonathan on Instagram for some time now and his podcasts are really great listens. The episode with Emily Saul, in particular, was like a series of little lightbulb moments for me and some of those things I will talk about in a later post but one of the things she talked about was being able to recognize yourself for the badass that you are. Most of us are just really bad at this, I am an awesome cheerleader for my kids, for my family and friends, for the kids I coach at school and for my colleagues – but for me not so much. And then as I turned the corner onto the last 100m in Prague it hit me that I am pretty badass at what I do, and Emily was right once you recognize what a badass you are and become your own cheerleader your whole perspective will change!
Next stop, Ryan Hill’s “Run the Mile You are In.” Any tips and suggestions on great reads gratefully received! And FYI just by getting your trainers on and getting out the door you are crushing it!!
Much love xx